I usually write about maternal narcissistic abuse because that's what I know (being an adult child of a narcissist), but most things I write about narcissism can be applied to any type of narcissist in your life. Most of these books can be used whether your narcissistic abuser is your father, your ex, or a even a friend, while some are only for dealing with maternal narcissism.
You can work on healing while still in contact with your abuser, but the most healing comes from going no contact.
I want to make a disclaimer before moving forward: before renting or purchasing any of these books and you live with your abuser, know that if they find them, it can cause issues at home. We all know how sneaky they are, they may search through your stuff, through your computer or through your kindle (or check on the kindle account on Amazon), so be careful! If you have a really sneaky narc in your life, then you may want to read any of these books (especially the ones that deal directly with narcissism) only at the library or the bookstore. Or leave the book at someone else's house to read. Or find a way to hide them well!
Now that that's out of the way, let's get to reading! (I LOVE to read, you guys! I am such a book hoarder that I probably own at least 500 books or more, with probably a good 1/3 of them being self-help...and I own a huge amount of these that I am listing below.)
The Ultimate Healing From Narcissistic Abuse Booklist
Are you dealing with parental narcissism (meaning, your mama--or your daddy--is a raging narcissist!)? Then these books are ah-may-zing! They have helped me through dealing with my own mother's awful behavior and helped me realize how to stop wallowing in the crap she's tried to drown me in:
- Toxic Parents by Susan Forward
- Will I Ever Good Enough? by Dr. Karyl McBride
- Mean Mothers by Peg Streep (although I will say that I feel Peg Streep displays too many narcissistic qualities for my own liking, so I'd take this book with a grain of salt)
- Mothers Who Can't Love by Susan Forward
- The Peaceful Daughter's Guide to Separating from a Difficult Mother by Karen CL Anderson
- Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents: How to Heal from Distant, Rejecting, or Self-Involved Parents by Lindsay C. Gibson
- Toxic Mom Toolkit : Discovering a Happy Life Despite Toxic Parenting by Rayne Wolfe
Are you dealing with a narcissistic spouse or ex? Then this section is for you:
- Psychopath Free by Jason MacKenzie
- The Smart Girl's Guide to Self Care by Shahida Arabi
- Coparenting With a Toxic Ex by Amy J. L. Baker PhD and Paul R. Fine LCSW
- When Loving Him is Hurting You by David Hawkins (a Christian-based book)
- The Wolf in Your Bed by Jill Harris
- POWER: Surviving and Thriving After Narcissistic Abuse: A Collection of Essays on Malignant Narcissism and Recovery from Emotional Abuse by Shahida Arabi
- Soul Vampires: Reclaiming Your Lifeblood After Narcissistic Abuse by Andrea Schneider
- Will I Ever Be Free of You? By Dr. Karyl McBride
- How To Kill A Narcissist: Debunking The Myth Of Narcissism And Recovering From Narcissistic Abuse by J. H. Simon
- Why is it Always About You? by Sandy Hotchkiss and James F. Masterson MD
- Disarming the Narcissist by
If you need to heal your inner child, then check these out (if you've been abused by your narcissistic parents, then you definitely need to heal your inner child):
- The Inner Child Workbook by Cathryn L. Taylor
- Healing the Shame that Binds You by John Bradshaw
- Recovery of Your Inner Child by Lucia Capacchione
- Reconciliation: Healing Your Inner Child by Thich Nhat Hanh
- Inner Bonding: Becoming a Loving Adult to Your Inner Child by Margaret Paul
- Affirmations for the Inner Child by Rokelle Lerner
If you need to learn how to build boundaries, then try these:
- The Power of a Positive No by William Ury
- Becoming the Narcissist's Nightmare by Shahida Arabi
- Where to Draw the Line: How to Set Healthy Boundaries Every Day by Anne Katherine
- Boundaries: When to Say Yes and How to Say No to Take Control of Your Life by Henry Cloud and John Townsend (also has a separate workbook)
- Boundaries After a Pathological Relationship by Adelyn Birch
If you need to learn how to heal your codependency, then these books may help:
- Codependent No More by Melody Beattie
- Beyond Codependency by Melody Beattie
- Conquering Shame and Codependency by Darlene Lancer
- Facing Codependence: What It Is, Where It Comes from, How It Sabotages Our Lives by Pia Mellody
If you want do some journaling to help heal from any type of abuse (especially narcissistic), then check these out:
- Let It Out: A Journey Through Journaling by Katie Dalebout
- Journaling: How To Write A Journal In A Way That Improves Every Aspect Of Your Life by Kyial Robinson
- Dear Self: An intro to self-therapy through introspection and journaling by Erik Lugnet
- Writing Ourselves Whole: Using the Power of Your Own Creativity to Recover and Heal from Sexual Trauma by Jennifer Cross
- Journal to the Self: Twenty-Two Paths to Personal Growth by Kathleen Adams
- Opening Up by Writing It Down, Third Edition: How Expressive Writing Improves Health and Eases Emotional Pain by James Pennebaker and Joshua Smyth
- Writing to Heal: A guided journal for recovering from trauma & emotional upheaval by James Pennebaker
- One to One: Self-Understanding Through Journal Writing by Christina Baldwin
- A Year in the Life: Journaling for Self-Discovery by Sheila Bender
If you have C-PTSD, then try these:
- Complex PTSD: From Surviving to Thriving: A GUIDE AND MAP FOR RECOVERING FROM CHILDHOOD TRAUMA
- The Body Keeps Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma by Bessel van der Kolk, MD
- Childhood Disrupted: How Your Biography Becomes Your Biology, and How You Can Heal by Donna Jackson Nakazawa
If you are rid of your narcissistic abusers, and want to work on finding out who you really are, then see if these help:
- Born for This: How to Find the Work You Were Meant to Do by Chris Guillebeau
- Soul Mapping by Nina H. Frost
- This Time Next Year: 365 Days of Exploration (Interactive Journal) by Cynthia Scher
- The Nocturnal Journal: A Late-Night Exploration of What's Really on Your Mind by Lee Crutchley
- The Happiness of Pursuit: Finding the Quest That Will Bring Purpose to Your Life by Chris Guillebeau
- Rediscover Your Story: A Journal for Creative Exploration by Drew Kimble
- The School of Life - Know Yourself Prompt Cards - Cards for Self-Reflection
- Your Best Year Ever: A 5-Step Plan for Achieving Your Most Important Goals by Michael Hyatt
- I Never Knew I Had a Choice: Explorations in Personal Growth by Gerald Corey
If you need some healing art therapy, then try this:
- The CBT Art Activity Book by Jennifer Guest
- 250 Brief, Creative & Practical Art Therapy Techniques by Susan Buchalter
- Zentangle Art Therapy by Anya Lothrop
- The World of Debbie Macomber: Come Home to Color: An Adult Coloring Book
- Art Heals: How Creativity Cures the Soul by Shaun McNiff
- No Excuses Art Journaling: Making Time for Creativity by Gina Rossi Armfield
- Create Your Life Book by Tamara Laporte
- The Art Journal Workshop: Break Through, Explore, and Make it Your Own by Traci Bunkers
- Art Journal Courage: Fearless Mixed Media Techniques for Journaling Bravely by Dina Wakley
If you find that you are mimicking your abusers by having anger issues, then check out these books:
- Anger: Wisdom for Cooling the Flames by Thich Nhat Hanh
- Anger Management Workbook for Men by Aaron Karmin LCPC (available on Kindle Unlimited)
- Rage: a Step by Step Guide for Overcoming Explosive Anger by Ronald Potter-Efron MSW PhD
- Anger: Taming a Powerful Emotion by Gary Chapman
- The Dance of Anger: A Woman's Guide to Changing the Pattern of Intimate Relationships by Harriet Lerner, PhD
Whether you are healing from parental narcissism or a relationship with one, I hope you find some helpful books on the list 💗 While each of our healing journeys will be different, most narcissists will inflict the same kind of pain on their victims. This leaves the world littered with people trying to heal from the same kind of abuse. Which is why books about narcissism are so readily available today (which is amazing for those of us who are healing from their abuse) and why all of them deal with the same issues (CPTSD, anger issues, codependency, etc.). This list is far from complete, but hopefully there is enough to get you started.
If you have any to add to this list, please share them below!!
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