39 Lessons I've Learned in 39 Years: Part Three

Here is the last installment of my 39 lessons in 39 years posts!  I am down to the line, people...in less than a week I will be the BIG FOUR OH!  Eeeeek!

It's exciting and scary, but I am definitely looking forward to it 💖

So, let's get on with it!!

Here are the last nine on my list:

31.  Lower your expectations in life, especially when you're dealing with people.  Trust me, you'll be much, much happier that way.  When you expect others to do their best every single time, you will always be disappointed.  That's just a fact, because nobody is perfect.  This works for everything.  When you can learn to not expect things, you'll learn how to be more easy going and how to roll with the punches when they inevitably happen.

32.  Don't compare your path in life to someone else's.  Your journey is different than everyone else's.  Don't compare your path to another person's when you two aren't really on the same path (even if it looks like you are).  Think of life like a board game: we all start out on the same beginning space, but when we roll the dice, that's when our paths split.  Nobody ever gets to the finish in exactly the same way.  

33.  Accept what you have.  Be happy with it.  The Stones said it right when they sang: "You can't always get what you want.  But if you try sometimes, you get what you need."  Think of everything in your life as something you need, even if you don't want it.  Being content with life and making the best of what you have is the only path to true happiness.  Because happiness is a state of mind, not a destination.  "I'll be happy when..."  No, you won't.  Not if you can't be happy with what you have now.

34.  It's okay to not like your kids sometimes.  I know, that sounds mean, but sometimes our kids are total assholes 😉😜  And guess what?  Sometimes we are, too!  That's normal.  And sometimes our kids really do hate us.  And that's also okay.  As long as our core feelings for our children and they for us is love?  Then we're all good.  Finding ways to see their humanity, and forgive them without holding grudges is the healthiest way to move passed it.  It's just not okay to say it  to our kid(s) (that sometimes we don't like them), no matter how much of a jerk they're being.  Because once we're done being angry at them for being weenies, we'll get over it and move on 😁

35.  It's cool to not be like everyone else.  In our family, we just don't do "normal".  Both boys were homeschooled for most of their lives.  We only use our dining room table to play board games or D&D at.  We don't keep regular hours like everyone else.  We just kind of don't belong anywhere, except with each other.  And we are perfectly fine with that.  Hopefully, as the boys get older, our small clan of weirdos will grow, and the new members will fit right in with us ;)

36.  Puppies are not for the faint of heart.  Sure, they are cute and adorable...but those little fuckers will also destroy your house.  I don't care how much puppy training you give them, they WILL eat your stuff.  Like, all your stuff.  So, don't get mad at puppy for destroying your shoes if you are too lazy to put them away yourself (because this happens in our house regularly).  Puppies are literally babies...don't forget that.  Just because you tell them NO 100 times doesn't mean they should learn what no means right off the bat.  And that puppy stage?  Lasts probably until they are around two, depending on their breed.  Sometimes it's longer.  So be prepared.  They WILL outgrow their dumbness.  Eventually (and it will have been worth it, I guarantee you!).  You just have to be patient and work with them.  And be on top of training them yourself every second you are with them.  If you can't, then don't get a puppy.  Adopt a dog from a kill shelter and save them from being put down.

37.  Own your weaknesses.  I am moody, messy, and overweight.  And I own that shit.  I don't shy away from my bad parts, because if I do, then I will find myself getting upset over stupid stuff.  And who does that help?  Nobody.  Also, when you own your bad parts, you are setting examples for your children to own their own weaknesses as well.  And when they can own their weaknesses, they can't be bullied for them.  Strong minds equal strong hearts.  And if you have a strong heart, you feel good about yourself, the good and the bad parts.  Ask yourself,  "How can I use my weaknesses for good or to help others?"  And go from there.  It could be a support group, your autobiography, a blog, etc.  Or you could develop a tool for others who have the same weaknesses to help them.  There are so many options.  OR, just being you and being proud.  Being open about who you are and being okay with you who are will help others be strong enough to do the same. 

38.  Be innovative.  If you can't afford to do something or to have something, find a way to make it happen with what you have.  If that means building something yourself, or finding ways to score something for free (hello Freecycle!), then do it!  Being innovative helps you to see that you are not actually lacking with what you have, because if you really want something or really want to do something, there is a way to get it done.  Always.  You just have to explore alternative avenues to get it.

39.  Oh em gee!  I am at thirty-nine finally!!  WHOO HOO!  So, last but certainly not least: Every year you are on this earth is something to embrace.  Instead of fearing getting older, be grateful you are still here.  I know suffering from depression or anxiety is really, really hard and life doesn't always feel lucky, but if you are still here?  That means there is still work to be done.  And what I mean by that is to keep fighting, and keep finding new ways to fight.  If what you're doing currently isn't working?  Then find a new way.  And keep searching out new ways until one works.  There is a way to get there, it's just that some ways are harder to get to than others.  And when you do get there, you'll be able to embrace the time you have here as a gift (not from anyone in particular, just a nice gift to enjoy).  Enjoying every age and every stage in life is key to real happiness.  Like I said above: happiness is a state of mind, not a destination.  So find your way, embrace the stage of life you are in, and truly live (rather than just exist--though sometimes, that's all we can do, and that's okay, too).

And that's all she wrote!  Well, for this post.  Tomorrow's DIY will have more of my writing 😜

What about you?  What have you learned during your years as a human?  I'd love to hear about it below!!  And if you're celebrating a birthday this month (or any month!), HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!

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